Taking a look back

The unrelenting downpour of rain drops from the dusky firmament disturbed the seemingly irrepressible cycle of eerie pictures playing in my sleep. Wishing to be stuck in a blissful dream once barged in my head but logically, hoping so is like wishing for death and I've never intentionally wanted that in my 20 years of living.

Anyway, when all my thoughts scurried a place in my mind, I effortlessly pursued for my phone and by effortlessly I mean not moving a single muscle but my right hand. My phone usually ends up under my pillow after being placed on the side of my bed at night. When I got a hold of it, I lifted my head with such effort to check the time and I saw that it was six in the morning. I let go of my phone, dropped my head on my bed and I was ready for a few more hours of sleep. 

Somehow, I knew what await me today. Having that prediction tied up around my head might  have sucked all the energy from my body. It would probably explain the incessant craving for more sleep and the laziness to get up from bed. I knew that I had to go through the same old motions of the day. I was aware that there were dirty dishes in the sink again, the puppies were as filthy as a pig and my room needs tidying. 

I am stuck in a spiral of mediocrity and the repetitive role that I have to play every day is slowly burying me in the ground of unhappiness and depression.

However, despite the apparent dullness gradually creeping from all sides of my life, I am convinced that nothing is permanent in this world and in a sudden spin of fate, things will definitely change, somehow.

In a few weeks from now, a new semester will kick in. New people to meet and new things to learn. I'll probably be so busy I may wish for a month of doing nothing. So I guess, I'll try as hard as I can to enjoy the remaining weeks of summer vacation and possibly learn to cease any unnecessary grumbling about insignificant stuff.