Thursday, July 29, 2010

A blindfolded life

     I've seen and met people who never in their lives saw light. Having to actually meet them makes me wonder how it feels like to fill in their shoes and live my life seeing nothing but an empty space. I tried  to imagine myself not having the gift of eyesight and doing so gives me scares. It's the last thing that I want to happen in my life. However, if I was really blind for the rest of my life then I would definitely miss seeing a lot of things. First, I would miss my loved one's faces. I will no longer see their smile if I crack a joke. I will no longer see them put their happy faces on everytime we watch funny shows on tv and I will no longer have the ability to look to their eyes and find their true feelings inside. Second of all, I would miss watching tv. Television has always been a very good friend of mine. It shows me MTV if I feel like watching music videos. It offers me TV Patrol if I want to see reality or if I simply want to get a good laugh then it lets me see Homer Simpson on its screen. Being blind for the rest of my life takes away my choice of entertainment.

     I would also miss reading books. Reading for me is like having tv in my head. I get to create the actions and characters in my mind and set them to motions. Perhaps, my personal computer at home would be as useless as a rock on the ground since I'm the only one who uses it other than my dad who turns on the PC only to check his email. Going outdoors would be something that I'll be least interested of doing. What is there to appreciate outside if you were blind. There's nothing to see, nothing to appreciate, not even a tiny speck of dust. I would miss the simplest of things around me. Our two dogs, who always greet me by barking up at me. I would even miss the things that I don't pay attention to when I can still see like the faces of our not-so-friendly neighbors.

     In a nutshell, being blind is like cutting half of your chances to live the life you want to be. Cutting half of your dreams and goals and worst cutting half of your desire to be happy.

Sunday, April 11, 2010

Life is tough---I have to be TOUGHER

     For the past few weeks, a thought has been straining me. It was formed from a usual introspection I do everytime an unanticipated situation comes out. I actually never expected to make this decision as fast but I guess it's because of the calling need that caused me to take that step without thinking twice. People have looked at me and see the kind of person living the easy life. I get this a lot and I guess it doesn't matter now how irritating it is since I can't stop people from thinking what they want to think. I try to get along with it as hard as I could until at this point that my ears are already numbed. However, like everybody else in this world, I have personal problems too.

     Anyway, I want to keep this short, simple and less dramatic as much as possible. I decided to stop going to school for now. I've made sure that I've given myself time to think about this but not long enough for things to be too late to fix. Before I proceed, I just want to let everyone know that I'm writing this not to get sympathy whatsoever but I just think that it wouldn't be right to just live you guys behind without even letting you know the reason why. First, it was hard for me to cross a different path knowing the fact that I am an unexperienced, naive young lad still haven't completed his plans for the future yet. However, it's something that I really needed to do for the people that are so important to me. It's easier to give up my education than to see the people that I treasure suffer from a problem that I know I could've fixed. I don't want things to be too late and I don't want to regret as well. So as early as now, I'm doing something about these personal problems. I know how important education is but then again things land in our life that we have to make a sacrifice to avoid it from getting worse.

     I never saw myself being so brave enough to make this kind of decision and just so you know, it was me who decided this and nobody from my family forced me to do so. It came from my own free will. 

     What about the computer society??You may be asking. Yes, as much as I want to serve the organization and the whole college of IT, I have to give that up too. I'll be filing my resignation as soon as I have time to do it and also I'll be filing a leave of absence to legally kick myself out of the three-one's list so in short you won't be seeing me for a long time.

     It may be hard to believe but I am happy with the decision I made though I know I have to live a lot of people behind. Wonderful people. I was actually worried at first right after making the decision mostly because of you guys(two-juans but now called three-juans and also the outgoing and incoming officers of CS). I was worried of what will be the reactions of everyone but now I'm taking everything pretty well so far. I am sad and at the same time happy. I am sad because I have to say goodbye and happy because I know that you guys won't stop from fighting for your dreams. I am doing the same thing but just using a different approach. As you may have noticed, the reasonwhy I needed to stop is general. Reasons are actually too personal for me to write so I hope you guys would understand.

     This part is going to be for my thank you's. Thank you guys(three-juan) for being such wonderful people. Each and everyone of you has been part of my life and I couldn't be more thankful for that. I won't forget the ups and the downs of our class and we've proven that problems faced with one group effort and determination can surpass even the highest peak of a mountain. I hope and pray that this year's class will be as stronger, smarter, and more determined to be successful.

     For the outgoing CS officers, thank you guys for being such good friends. You've always reminded me to be myself and to always be strong in every battle. You never lack the right words to say to make me feel better a few of them are  kuya jan and ate mien. Ate monds, ate anavs, and kuya elvin thanks for taking the time to go to my house to hear my side and most especially that time that you paid attention to every reason why I have to stop school. Thanks for always understanding.

     For the incoming officers, I apologize that it has to be this way. I hope you'll understand and as I am a few steps away from living the school I hope that you'll do the best you can to make Computer Society a better-performing organization as we have planned it to be. In the shortest period of time, I've seen you guys show willingness in being part of the organization and in contributing whatever you have in every way you can for the CS and from that I may say that I can already count on you.

     Ate monds and ate joey, you've always been such great friends. You always make me laugh and I apologize for sometimes being hard-head when it comes to meeting the CS responsibilities but I always believe that you understand.

     Thank you guys, all of you. I may not be able to see you for a long time but I know someday, somewhere out there we will be seeing each other again with a myriad of stories to share and I pray when that time comes we all have our stories of success in our pockets for us to tell. It will take a long time before that takes place but I can wait forever. Before I conclude, for everyone's information, I'll be going back to school but not for now. Of course, I want to earn a degree like every college student wants. The right time will come for me.


PS: To erwin and friends, for the past two years of my college life you guys have been sticking up with me. You've always believed in my leadership. We had some tough times but we got through it with flying colors and now erwin and friends is stronger than ever. We also had to face a few goodbyes but I can't believe that I'm going to be the second person that will be living the group and it sucks but I have to do it no matter what. What else can I say to you guys? Just do your best to finish school, always stick to each other and be strong.If you need help, I'm just a facebook or twitter away, alright? 



It was my first time to get involved with cheerleading and all I thought about it was just a pain in the ass but I was wrong when I was able to experience the fun it brought me. The best part of it was the fact that we were determined to bag the championship that we won. One of the best moments of my college life.

Sunday, January 17, 2010

I am defying gravity

I'm defying gravity in terms of....LEADERSHIP

     I mentioned before about this decision I had to make. A decision that could either destroy or make me. Well, after all the sleepless nights, I've finally made up my mind. People around me have been waiting for it and one day they just couldn't wait for an answer and asked me about my decision. 

     I will run as the President of the Computer Society in my school. It actually took a long time for me to make up my mind even if my friends were telling me to go ahead and just do it. They have this indefatigable belief that I have what it takes to run the organization and everytime that topic is brought about they never failed to remind me about the move I have to make. I've been weighing the pros and cons if whether I say yes or no. In economics, they use this term called "opportunity cost", this refers to the result of the choice you selected from among the options you have. So, the opportunity cost of deciding to run as the president of that organization is that I'll be able to develop my leadership skill, continue my passion and most importantly, lead the members of the Computer Society to the peak of success we've been dreaming to be. I mean, excluding the present administration, the Computer Society is not doing pretty well when it comes to performance. I don't mean to blame the officers for the failure because I've witnessed the major lack of unity and cooperation on the part of the students themselves. They'd rather do things themselves rather than accomplish tasks with the people studying under the same roof as they do. One of the million problems being faced by the CS.

     To reach the peak of success is not easy as it may sound, it doesn't even sound easy when you say it yourself. I mean it takes a lot of effort, perseverance and determination to achieve that goal. In addition to that, it doesn't take a year of service and leadership to achieve a big goal such as what I've mentioned but there's one thing I can be sure of, I'll do the very best I can to carry the organization one step at a time towards success. That reminds me about a famous quote which I don't know where I got or probably I just heard of but it says about a thousand mile journey begins with a single step. If I win the election and finished my term without a lot of accomplishments, it doesn't necessarily mean I didn't succeed. I only made the single step and for sure I must have gotten through a lot to be able to take that single step. It's up to the next batch of administration to continue the journey.

    I'm also aware of the fact that every decision comes consequences along with it. I was open to what people say and what I've been hearing so far sounds a bit scary. They've been telling me that carrying a load of huge responsibility and maintaining a good performance in school is one heck of a job to do. It reminded me of the quote "You can't serve two masters at the same time" but I'm still convincing myself that the quote doesn't apply at all times. I believe that I should just know two basic things when living a life of big responsibilities and its managing my time well and avoid procrastinating. I just hope that what road I took will not err me to a place I will regret forever in my life. It's one of the biggest challenges I accepted yet. I am defying gravity this year.

I am defying gravity in terms of....GETTING A JOB THIS SUMMER

     I'm in the legal age now to get a job and being 18 for me is getting half of my independence. However planning to get a job this summmer is not about exercising my independence. Well, it's already a given fact that I'm mature enough to apply for a job, earn money to pay for my school fee and give some to my parents. Reasons that motivated me to get a use of myself this summer. I don't want history to repeat itself. For the past few summers that had gone, I've been living in the world of mediocrity. I was like a futile fat lad staying at home doing absolutely nothing at all. 

    My bestfriend wants me to apply to the agency he's working in as a call center agent. He got accepted and he will be starting his first day of work next week. He told me that I can pass the tests and the interview. He believes in my ability so much that he thinks I'm better than him when it comes to writing and spoken communication. Someone who graduated as a valedictorian in high school wouldn't say such statement but my this person is different. Anyway, I accepted his offer and before this last semester ends, I'll be preparing my resume to apply. It will be my first, and every first's shakes my nerves but I am defying gravity this year so I'm going to shake everything off that will stop me from doing what I planned to do.