Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Sensitivity VS. A Computer Game

A few of the reasons why I take joy in going to birthday parties is the food, the opportunity to socialize and most importantly, the fact of being part in one of the most significant day of a person's life.

As a matter of fact, I just attended one today. This time, a friend of mine was celebrating his birthday. His name is Roy and he is the type of guy who loves food more than anything else which may be apparent on his physicality once you get to see him. The funny thing is I asked him last night, when we were talking over the phone if dieting and exercising have ever crossed his mind this summer. He gave me a very straight-forward answer. 

He said NO.

Our laughs seemed to have cut the smooth-flowing dreams of our neighbors but as the laughter faded in the background, somehow, I felt so stupid for asking such question. Well, I thought as a friend, I should have known better. Anyway, at the back of my mind I realized how Roy loves who he is and what he looks like and I bet he won't trade his face and body with anyone else.

The birthday party was modest. His family and friends were there and of course we, his college friends, were counted in action as well.

Roy is going through a tough time. He had to stop school and the worst thing is he has to wait for his problems to get fixed. When I went through the same situation, I pitied myself for not having the ability to resolve the problems of my family. I felt completely worthless and the more I counted the passing days, the more I felt the pain.

And so when I stepped into his house for the second time and right there before my eyes I saw the set of food on the table and the whole family gathering together to celebrate Roy's important day, I felt nothing but bliss.

The moment I took my plate, I was wishing nothing but the best for Roy and for him to have his best birthday ever.

Then there came the crack on the road.

The others wanted to play a computer game somewhere distant from Roy's house. We were talking about placing bets and all. I was with them, laughing, joking around, looking at the whole scheme as a joke. 

Then, before I knew it, they did want to go out and play a silly computer game. They suddenly became serious about it and what made the crack on the road worst was their incessant force to drag me into it. 

It was something  I was not and will never be interested into. 

To cut the story short, they forced me to be away for awhile, leave the Man of the Day (Roy, the birthday celebrant) behind and play a computer game instead. 

I just thought it was childish first of all to replace a friend's birthday celebration that comes once a year over a computer game that can be played anytime, every day.

Of course, I didn't go with them. Deep inside, I got pissed off when they were literally dragging me all the way to an Internet Cafe.

There was nothing to be happy about with their obvious display of insensitivity. Display of insensitivity to me and most especially to Roy.

At the end of the day, I went home alone. I didn't wait for them to come back and just gave my apology to Roy in behalf of the others and greeted him a very Happy Birthday.

WHEN I DECIDED TO PUT DOWN THEIR OFFER, I'VE NEVER FELT SO ALONE IN MY LIFE. I  FELT EVERYONE LEFT ME BEHIND FOR NO REASON. THE NOISE OF THE BIRTHDAY PARTY REMODELED INTO SILENCE. I WAS SWEATING PROFUSELY AND I FELT RAGE THAT I WANTED TO BREAK SOMETHING. I DIDN'T WANT TO CATCH ANYBODY'S ATTENTION. IT WAS MY FRIEND'S BIRTHDAY AND THE LAST THING I WANTED TO DO WAS TO STEAL THE SPOTLIGHT FROM HIM.

IS IT A CRIME TO EXPECT SENSITIVITY AND RESPECT FROM YOUR FRIENDS??? IT WAS THIS QUESTION THAT APPEARED TO HAVE HELD ME ON MY SEAT ON THE BUS WHILE I WAS MAKING MY WAY HOME. IT WAS THIS QUESTION THAT MADE ME STARE BLANKLY UP IN THE NIGHT SKY. 

AND HERE I AM ABOUT TO FINISH MY POST WHILE HOPING FOR THINGS TO GET BETTER  TOMORROW.

6 comments:

  1. "Without self-respect, there can be no self-love. Without self-love, there can be no love or respect for others."

    i think they don't know how to respect their selves that's they couldn't respect others :(

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  2. I couldn't agree more! thanks! At least there's one who actually understands what I am trying to say.

    : )

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  3. everything's happen for a reason at lahat ng dahilan ay may mapupulot na aral.. sabihin mo sa kanya.. hehehe

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  4. I think the experience told you a lot about the characters of the people you hang around with. There's no judgmental value, but there is a lesson there somewhere

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  5. you got that right Jonathan. It was a lesson learned for me and for them. I learned not to be too trusting and for them, I bet they learned to be a little more sensitive.

    : )

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